Haven

Jul. 18th, 2013 09:43 pm
dahlia_moon: (Default)
I've been binging on Haven where I've literally been just taking in as much as I can and ignoring everything else (even other social media sites I'm on) since about last Wednesday (the 10th). This was also due in part to having the worst earache I've ever had the displeasure to suffer through and where, as a result, I hadn't been able to sleep all that much--not for lack of trying, but I'd get into bed and all I could focus was on the excruciating pain, and maybe if I didn't lie on my side I could probably fall asleep just to have to get up in a few hours.

I got the earache trying to jam a Q-tip into my ear five days after my trip to the lake where I got some water in my ear unfortunately, but I thought the water was gone by that point! But it wasn't! I just made it worse somehow when I used the Q-tip and dislodged some dormant water or something because I did get that insane sensation like when your ears haven't popped, and I did feel like some water was sloshing around in there. The relief--pure relief--only came when I got the bright idea to put a hot towel on my ear to ease some of the soreness that I probably caused with the Q-tip--no matter how gently I thought I used the damned thing--but I wasn't so hopeful on the dislodging of water from my ear, and I was right. -_- Still feel like my left ear is full of water (and ugh, at one point, I was also scared that my ear was filled with sand as well because the lake floor is all sand and when you try to do handstands on the bottom of the lake with your legs kicking in the air, some sand is wont to get lodged somewhere uncomfortable and unwanted; this is probably not a good idea at all, doing the handstands and other crazy moves I mean, hence the uncomfortable water in ear almost a week and a half later), but I no longer want to chop off my ear to ease the aching pain, so...win, I guess?

BUT! Let's go back to talking about more fun things so--Haven!
Read more... )
dahlia_moon: (Sokka-Sad)
Excuse me while I vent a bit here.

I HATE double standards, and lemme tell ya, I get them a lot around here. For the most part, I can take it because I know my parents are deeply rooted in their old-fashioned ideals and whatnot, and it's not like they can change and it's not like I'm a confrontational person so I won't blow my top over it because that'd be childless and it won't solve anything but make me guilty later on. Although I have told my parents how much I hate that they treat me differently just because I'm a girl, and therefore inferior as opposed to my brothers. But- and I hate to admit it- they're probably right. Left to my own devices, I don't think I'd make it to my next birthday.

I know that my parents are only protecting me because there are a lot of bad things in the world, it's just kind of hard to like it in the moment, you know?

I don't know. And it's not like they baby me or anything, it's just when it comes to basic rules like when we're allowed to stay out till, and whatnot, I always get the short end of the stick. The brothers can stay out till midnight, but I can't stay out past eight unless someone is with me but my dear brothers don't have to adhere to the same rules, which just sucks because it's ridiculous. But I can't seem to do anything about it because they are right.

So basically I feel as though I'm stuck.

Just let me hope that it can get better when I'm actually an adult. (And being a few inches taller would help, you hear that Universe??)

------

This morning, twin brother and I found some ants near the potted plants in the kitchen on our way to school.

Brother promptly started to stomp on them, and I felt sad for the poor little creatures. They were just minding their own business and suddenly there's a big shoe coming down on them. It made me think of that Hey Little Ant book.

I know ants are annoying and everything, but they don't deserve to die. Sheesh.

------
dahlia_moon: (I'd rather die than be away from you (Tw)
So, it seems as though my thyroid gland is abnormal.

.
.

I don't know really what to make of that because that's all the people at the family center said.

I had another appointment on Tuesday with like a nurse practitioner who my family doctor recommended when I expressed my concern about my period not showing up for like four months. We talked a bit, and she assured me that it was common for me to be irregular, and then she sent Mom and me off to the lab, and they drew some blood.

And today they called and said that we had to go and see the family doctor again so that he can recommend a specialist for me to see about my abnormal thyroid.

Mom thinks that more than likely we'll have to go and see Dr. M again who was a endocrinologist specialist who I saw when I first started having my period when I was eight.

I don't particularly like him; I don't know why, he was very nice and helpful. Maybe I was just weirded out because he was a guy doctor and it felt weird talking about my menstrual cycles with him. Yeah, that's probably it. But I might just have to grin and bear it if we end up having to see him again.

-------
dahlia_moon: (PC Andy)
Have doctor's appointment today. And I'm not looking foward to seeing him today. I hate hospitals, for some reason they make me all jittery inside. And I'm nervous and not feeling well.

God, I just want today to be over with all ready.

But, on the bright side, at least I get today off from work. Of course I have to work tomorrow instead, but I love Wednesdays, much more than Tuesdays. I just hate Tuesdays in general, so it sucks for me to work on the day. But Wednesdays are good all around.

I think I'm just dreading the doctor's because of the results. I mean I don't think there's anything wrong with me, but you never know. And plus, I hate nutrionist people- well, not the people in general, just their job. I'm sure the people are nice and whatnot, but I hate, hate their job. But I gotta have one as of right now, so what can ya do?

Gonna go and try to eat amidst all the nervousness floating in my stomach now...
dahlia_moon: (X/1999)
Okay, so I went down for some food, and long story short, I cut myself.

I actually cut a small piece of skin of my first finger on my left hand. Do I need to go to the hospital for that? Parents went somewhere and probably won't be back for awhile, and brothers are asleep. I've actually lost a lot of blood - more so than when I usually cut myself- and it's still throbbing with pain a little bit.

I've managed to minimize the bleeding to a somewhat less dizzying amount...but I'm worried about my skin. Will I need to tear it off, or will it heal together by itself?

I have no idea what will happen now, and that scares me more than the blood itself because now I have all sorts of wild ideas running through my mind.

I really need to be more careful.
dahlia_moon: (Sokka-Sad)
I've been feeling kind of blah, lately.

I hope I'm not getting a bug or something. Mom is scheduling a physical exam for me soon, and I have to get a nutrionist soon. And have to hopefully check that everything else is okay with me because I've been feeling sort of irregular and I haven't had my period in about three months, so I'm kind of worried about that.

My menstrual cycle has been irregular before, but it has usually shown up by this time.

I've become a hypochondriac. It's so weird, usually I dismiss everything that's wrong with me as being minor and everything, but now it's just getting me depressed.

School is, ironically, going better than ever. (Of course that's because it is the only thing that I've allowed to eat my brain for weeks.) I'm even happy about my math grade (dude, a ninety...I hardly ever get those in algebra).

------

re: Hana Yori Dango live-action movie

I can't properly express my happiness right now...

Makino and Doumyouji, chase around the world??

------

Going to go back now and try to study without passing out and definitely try to not get stressed over everything, because that makes things even worse for me.

Easier said than done, though.
dahlia_moon: (Sokka-Sad)
The saddest thing in the universe:

NEW YORK - Heath Ledger was found dead Tuesday in a Manhattan apartment in what police sources are calling an apparent suicide or accidental overdose. He was 28.

According to the New York Times, Ledger was found naked and unconscious with pills strewn all around him. Police sources told the Times that the death appeared to be a suicide or an accidental overdose.

The rest of the article's here.

I loved Heath. I first saw him in '10 Things I Hate About You.'

Honestly, I was very shocked to see this article on hotmail. Usually, celebrity deaths don't shock me. (They're sad and everything, but it's not as though it's personal.) But this was...unexpected and truly tragic.
dahlia_moon: (Gaspard Ulliel)
So, I've been thinking about fandom, and really, my participation in it. Y'see what I've noticed, more often than not, is when real life interferes and I'm not spending time in fandoms, when I finally have free time and try to jump back in, it's like I feel out-of-step. And it's just a really depressing feeling. I feel dragged down with all the stress of real life and fandom is then viewed as though it's a chore- something you have to do to not feel deprived of something- which it isn't, but when you try to acclimate yourself into that environment again even if you've been gone only for a short period of time, it flops back at you lifelessly and makes you think why am I stressing myself even more? But you cannot not go back to fandom even if you know it's not good for your overall health/mind.

It's addicting, I suppose then. But on the bright side, it only happens toward the beginning of me entering fandom again, after I've tried to avoid it for other pressing things.

And don't even get me started on how much school and real life drains me of inspiration- usually for everyone else (I've noticed), it's their muses' fuel, but for me, it just makes me listless and my brain empty of creative juices.
dahlia_moon: (Gaspard Ulliel)
*oh head, please stop hurting.

*oh, fandom, please stop being so addictive.

*oh, life, please take a break from your frenzy.
.
.
.
.
.

*ded*
dahlia_moon: (Default)
I just saw this tonight.

But...but the three specials won't be until 2009! And we'll probably not get it until 2010. I'll be in college by then...

Oh, this fandom is so torturous.
dahlia_moon: (if you stay I don't need heaven (Twiligh)
So, on my fifteen minute break from my job today, I ran across the street from the library to this bookstore nearby and I asked the saleslady there if they had Eclipse and she said that it's out of print and that they'll get more. So, they'll call me once they get restocked.

Yeah, it's all fine and dandy. I've waited a full year. I can probably wait some more.

I think we all know what this means now. I'm probably going to spoil myself rotten.

No. Must resist the temptation.

*twiddles thumbs and whistles*

Yep, I can wait...I'm probably going to get it by the end of the week, or sooner. Right? Yes. Absolutely.

My Facebook horoscope, it knows me so well:
Taurus: Don't be too disappointed if something you've been looking forward doesn't go as planned this week. You've got to go with the flow.

I'm actually really just going to go 'with the flow.'

I just realized that maybe I should have swung by the bookstore earlier or called...I can be such a scatterbrain sometimes, it's scary. Guh.

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